Carlsbergensis interruptive

Notes on a press conference announcing Carlsberg’s recent launch of its new slogan  

Auditorium — presentation — 45 minutes — noisy — flashing lights — thumping music — film clips — sport — high adrenalin — anthemic rock — incentive to get drunk? — man at podium — ‘iconisation’ — 55 production lines across the world — all will adapt to the new visual identity — words — heritage — quality — semper ardis — character — the reward of a Carlsberg for doing the right thing —  that calls for a Carlsberg  — more words — witty — confident — premium — dramatic — in most countries the strap-line will be in English — packaging — comedy in ads — Everest — TV aerial — football — man on moon — interesting to see an ad that shows a pint with a magnifying glass picking out the word hops (I) — more words — aromatic — crisp refreshing taste — back to brandolese — global and local approval — what does that mean? — questions please — Lithuania — ban on alcohol advertising — what will you do — Russia — sex, new cars — eh? (I) — yes, probably the best lager in the world has gone —part of the DNA of the brand — will it overshadow itself — targeting a mind set — do people really buy this guff? (I) — lunch — that calls for a Carlsberg — really?